GOOD MORNING, TEARS.


We were walking. I saw strangers walking with us. And then we ended up in the hospital. I can’t remember what happened. But mom was lying there. Blood over her. Papa was crying. I can’t go near them. I just can’t. I saw mom’s broken leg. She wasn’t saying anything. She never said any single word but she saw papa crying. I remained calm and strong. I went beside her. Kissed her in the forehead. I need to go somewhere so I left them there. Mom was scheduled for an operation.

Dad called me up. They were talking about funeral reservation. What the hell was going on?! I rushed. I went there and told me mom was gone. No. This can’t be. I remembered my last post here. I remembered my untold letter. I haven’t told her how much she mean to me, how much I love her and how much I’m sorry for being an imperfect grand daughter. My world stopped. I can’t handle it. Tears began falling. I can’t accept it. No. We were just talking last night, gave mom her requested chicken mcdo and we slept in my room together. Why did this happened? Everything happened in just a snap. She’s gone. I cried a lot. It’s hard to accept. I closed my eyes.

Then I opened my eyes again, saw mom beside me. Looked out the window, it’s already morning. Oh God! Everything was just a dream. Mom’s still with me. I hugged her. She was shocked because I started crying. I can’t say a single word but she kept on asking me what happened. I just cried and held her tight. I’m thankful that everything was just a dream. Then I told her about it. Still, can’t stop myself from crying. 

Then mom told me to go back to sleep. Yeah. I did. Still catching my breath. Then woke up at lunch time. Went down, prepared my meal and hugged her again.

My fear was shown in my dream once again. I can’t afford to lose her. NO.

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